The Ratchet Girl in Me

For about 8 months I was a part of the “unemployed Americans” statistic. At the beginning of my unemployment status due to a lay off, I vowed to myself that I would not gain weight, but, go the other direction and lose. Getting up every morning and working out for about 2-3 hours at 24 hour fitness, 4- 5 times a week, I made a few friends, more so on complete accident.

If you know anything about me, when I’m working out, I am not even remotely close to being the cutest person in the gym,nor do I like to be bothered with mindless small talk about the weather, any sporting event, or flirting. I am there to work and sweat and make my fat cry.  However, if there was an award for the woman that looks the most homeless, I’m pretty sure I would have the votes of all the judges. The men in the gym were not having that.  I end up making friends with the assistant manager. We will reference him as Dub. I’m not sure how it happened, but a simple hello turned into long drawn out conversations after my workout when I’m at my least attractive.

Out of nowhere, he mustered up the balls to ask me for my phone number. We did the whole texting thing back and forth and I eventually found out about his child, his ex wife, and buttload of other things that I made me try my hardest not to give him the side eye. After having conflicting schedules for so long, him getting fired from the gym for something completely stupid, and him just being plain difficult, he finally asks me out.

We were scheduled to go to brunch after church one Sunday. I’m Catholic, so my church service ends at normal hours in the morning, he is not, so I waited it out until about 12:30-1pm. I call. No Answer. I text him. He texts back, hey, I just got out of church! I say are we still going to brunch? No answer. After this. I never texted back never called. I just let it be. I knew the deal. I’m thinking ok. He may not be married, but he sure is “occupado.” So I let it go and never contacted him again. This was months ago.

Last week. I’m coming out of the health foods store, and as I am walking to my car, I scurry out of the way as this car, very similar to Dub’s car approaches me. He has to stop in order to turn to the next aisle to park and I look dead in the car. Through the tinted windows I cannot see well but I do see a face, look at me and then turn their head back super quick and continue to look straight. I didn’t catch it at first, but then when I paused, and thought about it, I said, hmph. This certainly cannot be Dub! Next I see the car park right in front of me to my left. I see a woman in the passenger seat. Him in the drivers seat and a kid. He gets out, making no eye contact and I stare and watch. They get the child out the back seat and all walk in like a happy family. He continues to preoccupy himself with the child in his arms and I slowly back my car out. They have to pass in front of my car in order to get in the store. This is when I see his whole face and know that it is him. Now, the ratchet girl that lives inside of me wanted to slam on my accelerator and hit him, but, he was carrying a child so I figured, no need in penalizing the child for his stupidity. Then I thought, oh. I should go ahead and park and go back into the store and speak and introduce myself to the woman. A buttload of things kept running through my mind but fortunately me and my non existent criminal record, I decided it was not worth and to just take myself and my lactose free yogurt home. I can’t say the whole situation form start to finish did not grind my gears but, it sure made me want to do further investigations with the men I meet!

If any of this happened to you, what would you have done? How would you have handled it? Was there anything I should have done differently?


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